The Importance of Grieving, remembering and Honouring

August 15, 2017

 So I have been thinking a lot recently with the sudden Death of Chester Bennington, the lead singer of Linkin Park and the outpouring of sadness from the fans worldwide, which is to be expected with any death, not saying other people aren't ,but Chester was one of these rare talents that will live on forever, not only due to his overall character, but his singing ability to change between different vocal ranges. The loving nature of Linkin Park and it's iconic and trans-formative music,which has set precedence's across the music and film industry, after the death of Chester there has been a surge in the downloading of their music, but also the Transformers films of which their music featured in heavily.


What has touched me more so, is that Linkin Park have started a RIP/celebration page attached to their Website to allow the fans worldwide to show there love and appreciation for Chester and the Band, but also to allow the fans to grieve publicly, aside from this, MIND, the mental health charity in collaboration with Linkin Park have set up memorial events across the globe to celebrate Chester's life, of which I am going to one tomorrow Night. Linkin Park have only recently buried their Lead Singer and best friend, whilst they are dealing with their own grief, they are helping their fans Worldwide to deal with their love, admiration and sadness for a beautiful soul. It just shows the true measure of the band and people within it. I remember watching one of there concerts, where they stopped the concert as a person was hurt, they made sure he was attended to and made sure he was safe and looked after, so not only are they kind and caring, but they feel more like a family.


You may ask where I am going with this, well as you may be able to tell from my writing that I love the band and Chester, R.I.P, but what the band and MIND are doing is very important in helping people come to terms with and deal with their grief. I remember when I was 17 my best friend was killed in a car accident and for a long time I could not accept that he was dead. Fast forward to the Day of his funeral. I remember sitting in the Church with his family and friends, feeling anxious and upset, but still not completely taking on board what was happening, well as the coffin came into the Church I fell apart and have never cried so much in my life, apart from the death of my Cat to a brain tumor, of which even talking about either and I can feel my stomach tie in knots and I feel sick and upset. After the funeral, we went to the Crematorium

and whilst the coffin was being lowered down the music of Watership Down was playing, the song was Bright eyes, even thinking about it now, I'm not going to lie, it feels shit. For many Months and years after I was racked with guilt and anger and refused to talk to people or go to therapy, but the most important thing on reflection would have been to go to therapy and discuss how I felt, but I was a young man and if i'm honest I couldn't have told you. Seeing the coffin allowed me to accept he was dead, the same as when I had to put my Cat to sleep and then having him cremated. I still have a book of his pictures and a silver paw print of his paw.


Why am I saying these things, well on reflection it was important and mentally healthy to follow these steps as it was a way of accepting that these things had happened and don't get me wrong, they were awful but it was also a way of of honoring the life, love and friendship.Yes there was a roller coaster of emotions, much like there are now with The Death of Chester, yes there will be anger and depression from people because of Chester's death, yes there will be question of could people have helped or done more, but this is part of the grief cycle and you are only human and you need to be gentle with yourself and allow yourself to feel these emotions, as without dealing with these feelings, you won't be able to accept these things, it pains me to admit it, but I hid how I felt for many years, but this is the benefit of hindsight and I cannot be hard on myself for it, as what will it achieve? Nothing. What I did do was go to therapy and this has helped me to deal with a lot of things.


What Linkin Park are do is kind and caring. Even just after Chesters Death, Mike Shinoda, one of the band members and rap artist, posted about people reaching out to the Samaritans and other mental health charities and medical professionals for help


There is now a massive public celebrations of Chester's life, through murals, Mass playing of the bands music through instruments and Memorials


be safe, reach out if you need help or just need to talk. You are human, it's OK to have feelings


RIP Chester


Much Love







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